"I'm only human I'm just a woman, Help me believe in what I can be and all that I am, Show me the stairway I have to climb, Lord for my sake, teach me to take one day at a time".....
The old song is in my head today. It's been one of those days when things seem so overwhelming. I'm not the most patient person. I'm not saying that I expect prayers to be answered immediately, but I tend to get distracted in the time in between. When Andy and I were planning our wedding, I started praying about our home. I've always known that this trailer wouldn't last forever. This particular trailer was made in 1970. It's been a good one, but Andy and I knew we'd need to move on soon or sink some serious money into repairs here. I think they define it as a "money pit." Right now we've got holes in the roof, holes in the floor.....well you get the idea.
So we started talking and I started praying. I prayed for the home that the Lord wanted us to have. I thought at the very least that we could upgrade to something bigger, 3 bedrooms maybe?
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. Isaiah 55:8
Soon after I started praying the answer came. My Uncle and Grandpa were planning to move. They asked Andy and I if we would be interested in taking over the payments for the 1998 model trailer that is just across the yard from the one we are in. The catch? It's still 2 bedrooms, and the trailer needs a lot of work. Wait, I did ask for bigger, right? Our current home is 12x60 the 98 model is 14x60. It's not much bigger, it seems small, but remembering that the Lords ways are not our own, we said we'd take it. Then the waiting started.
I wanted so badly to jump in head first, to start scrubbing, painting, and renovating. You know the story about the grasshopper and the ant? I understood the Ant's haste in preparation for winter. I wanted everything done by the time school started. Fast forward a few months. School is scheduled to start in 20 days. Here I am, still waiting, and according to my nature, worrying.
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or
drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than
food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air;
they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father
feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying
can add a single hour to his life?" Matt 6:25-27
I need to stop. I try to stop getting anxious about this move, stop being overwhelmed by it all. The Lord's timing is perfect right?
Do not be anxious about
anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present
your requests to God" Philippians 4:6
It's pretty clear that worry isn't something God wants in my vocabulary. So I'm going to keep on singing. "One day at a time, Sweet Jesus..." If all I can do is pray and sing to keep my mind from worry then that's what I'll do. Prayerfully, Praising, and Trusting that he's got it covered.